August: Llama Llama, Red Pajama

 (Or How I Spent My Summer Vacation) 

Lord, please, don't forsake me...

Dateline:  Denver, CO

“You actually think you’re going to read on the plane?”  

The tonality of Defarge’s inquiry was unmistakable -- plainly suggesting a knowing condescension mixed with a dollop of genuine pity at Jerrence’s naïveté.  While he didn’t know the singular expression that captured such a nuanced sentiment, he was sure the French probably had a word for it.  

In any event, he immediately refrained from putting the Vanity Fair magazine in his backpack.  No great loss, he thought, it was already stuffed to the gills with games, toys, snacks and spare clothes that his 3 yr old traveling companion apparently required for the 4’ish hours involved in their travel from O'Hare to Denver. 

“Gaga” was accompanying his granddaughter Sloane (not unlike Ken Kesey, Jack Kerouac and the Merry Pranksters) on her return home -- setting off to discover America as it were -- perhaps experiencing a journey of therapeutic self-discovery while having more fun than possibly was legal.

At least in Indiana.  

Oh and in the process, meet many interesting people.

Sloane, this is uncle Bob...

But Jerrence was savvy enough, albeit just barely, to not make a big deal about his heroic role in sheparding his granddaughter by himself — lest he receive the verbal bitch slap (“I took two kids under the age of 7 to China by myself, slick”) that would surely (and justifiably) be forthcoming from his wife. 

What ensued over the next two weeks were, as Shakespeare might say, the stuff that dreams were made of.   

If those dreams were from Mel Brooks.  Or Fellini. 

"Swear, Chris - what happens in Vail, stays in Vail..."

Venturing into The Great Unknown with an enthusiastic if possibly unstable sidekick couldn't help but remind Jerrence of many of his experiences at Notre Dame -- both distant and recent -- and the thrilling expectation of yet another exciting football season, full of both pitfalls and possibilities.  

Buckle up.  

Here. We. Go.  

Quote of the Week

"Gaga, would you pick me up... and carry me like a burrito?"

Sloane

Is a house really a home w/o a urinal in the garage?  

The philosopher Art Linklater once observed, "Kids say the darndest things..." and just like most to the conversations that Jerrence was involved in while in Colorado, he had no idea what his granddaughter was talking about.   

Burrito?  For reasons inexplicable, his mind immediately went to images of a college-era Ungie attacking Mexican fast food -- focused, sweating, almost feral.  

Eek.  Jerrence had thought therapy had removed that memory permanently.  Apparently not.

Or...  perhaps Scoobie Doo had aired a hispanic themed episode?  Lord knows Shaggie and Scoobie love their food.  But what would that mean?

"Sloane, have you ever seen 'Eraserhead'?"  

But upon further reflection, maybe Jerrence was overthinking this.  After all, who doesn't love a good burrito, stuffed with a nice chorizo, warm queso and refried beans?  Just a simple analogous expression of a young girl's evolving palate.

Then again, if the three year old really was already speaking in metaphor, it represented a far more troubling implication -- had she been talking to her great uncle Tim?

Word of the Week.

Used in a sentence paragraph: Young Jerrence stared into his G&T, the Vail mountainside behind him as the gloaming of the August evening continued.

Even with the ambient noise of the highway far below, the idyllic Arcadian vibe of his environs was unmistakable.

This sure doesn't suck, he thought.

Sure, his compadres for this annual long weekend weren't the sharpest tools in the shed -- no one was ever going to mistake this group for an ad hoc G7 Leaders Summit -- but they were good people, if a bit simple, with their hearts in the right places and interesting, often unorthodox, outlooks on life.

Jerrence enjoyed this toss salad of humanity.  And feeling comfortably numb, with the gin beginning to take effect on his cerebral cortex... his attention wandered to the prospect of the final evening's meeting of the minds:  

Feifar + bourbon + hot tub = what exactly?

August Thoughts  

There is no other day

Let's try it another way

You'll lose your mind and play

Free games for may...

They often refer to the football field as the 'field of play.'   Post-Colorado, I see many parallels with the playground experience.

Like football, playgrounds (or zoos, museums etc.) can be a singularly Darwinian experience where the timid quickly discover they need to man up or they’re never getting their turn in the sandbox.  

One sees the full gamut of 'player':

Hunter / gatherer.  

Alpha and beta (omega?).  

Predator and prey. 

One quickly can identify who is Mufasa and Simba.   And who is Scar.

For every Fighting Irish, there's a Miami Hurricane.  For every Vanderbilt, there's a Georgia.  For every Nebraska, there's a Colorado.

Lastly, I am uncomfortable interacting with the other mothers.  Unfamiliar with playground etiquette, I am completely intimidated by all the alpha females.  Playgrounds rife with Jimmy Johnsons and Urban Meyers.

And I’m pretty sure their water bottles weren't holding Le Croix.  

This, too, is not unlike my Notre Dame experience with women.   Or college football circa 2024.  

So what's any of this got to do with ND football.  Maybe only these insights:

1)  Develop early a wide range of skills - talent matters even if you're young.

2)  Identify early who you can trust - and with whom you can collaborate.

3)  Being nice only takes you so far - and being an alpha isn't necessarily a bad thing.

And as it pertains to the selection of ND team captains, isn't it telling that:

•  4/5 are from the defensive side.  (Bet the 'under' a lot this year!)
• Arguably, all of them would be considered in the short list of the team's best players.
• The lone offensive player is a transfer but who has seemed to lead from the very first day he's been on campus.

Buddy's Buddy

The vast majority of the 'A' Lot Musings readership is familiar with Jerrence's daughter, Ryan - she of the successful high end travel planning business and mother of Dragons to the preternaturally happy Sloane.

A little less visible is his other daughter, Shea, who shrewdly flew off to Paris three years ago - a decision, irrespective of one's political lean, anyone might be envious of come November.

Like a lot of Parisians, she buggered off to Bordeaux -- as one does -- once the unwashed Olympic masses hit town in July.  She goes to weddings on the Adriatic and summers in Greece.  She eats flaky croissants and drinks ambitious yet unpretentious wines while quietly judging foreigners for paying big bucks for their varietals. Her mother and I are both proud and (more than a little) jealous.

"Nuit, nuit!"

But she's also a huuuge basketball fan.  Particularly of her alma mater, Michigan (better that than their football team) and the Golden State Warriors - the latter's fandom she enbraced well in advance of everyone jumping on the NBA champion Steve and Steph and Klay bandwagon... (hey, no one's really a fan of Draymond).

To that latter allegiance, it only seems appropriate, post-Olympics, in deference to both Shea and the clutch performance, to making Steph Curry this edition's Buddy's Buddy.  

Mr. Curry is Old School in embracing a "shooters shoot" mentality - and if you ever saw me play basketball, you'd know that's a sentiment I can really get behind.  

So when the first few games of the Olympics, when he couldn't hit the ocean standing on the beach, he didn't panic -- basically saving the US's ass from the Serbs and the French (how ironic) in the final two games.

If you haven't seen the last 3 minutes of the finals, google 'em.

RE-PETE (A shameless, illegal lift of Pete Sampson's weekly mail-bag)

Year #3 at probably any school represents something of a tipping point, when the referendum -- rightly or wrongly -- comes due on whether one has hired The Right Guy.

At Notre Dame, that is especially true -- not only because ND Nation has the patience and self-absorption of a toddler but because Year III has brought national championships from it's most storied coaches.

Quite the litmus test for anyone sitting in that particular head coach's chair.  

No pressure, Marcus.  

With that as a set up, allow me to share Mr.  Sampson's pre-season summary on the team as it relates to their leader: 

The coach

If this season goes to plan, Freeman will no longer be referred to as a “first-time head coach” by the end of it.

Notre Dame’s pick to succeed Kelly has learned on the job since Swarbrick swiftly promoted the former defensive coordinator after the program’s all-time winningest coach bolted for LSU. There’s been a lot of learning on the job since, a bargain Notre Dame made with itself by promoting Freeman.

For Notre Dame, there’s reasonable hope Freeman will take another step, which is more important than his 19-8 overall record, the most wins by any Irish football coach in his first two seasons. When Freeman gambled on the quarterback position his first season and lost, he went out and got Sam Hartman and then Leonard. When he got caught flat-footed with one offensive coordinator hire, he hit a home run a year later. Last year’s mess at wide receiver was rectified by three incoming transfers this offseason.

Point being, Freeman has learned at every step. That must continue.

Source: The Athletic

August 25, 2024

Cocktail of the Month

Perhaps you've already heard me sing the praises of Jerome Perez, Esq. -- talented screenwriter and cutting edge mixologist.

To be the beneficiary of one of his visionary libations (and to read his treatments) is to be graced with something special. 

 

Which brings us to Brown Butter Bourbon - this summer's whiskey discovery, courtesy of Jerry... so easy to create that even Jerrence couldn't screw it up.   

So smooth, so yummy.   

...and a concoction that I introduced Messrs. Feifar and Buckley on the aforementioned trip to Colorado to great approval by acclamation (if an empty bourbon bottle can be construed as approval).

Coincidentally, yet another thing Mr. Perez and I share is an affection for the author John Updike's writing - and his preferred cocktail which also happens to be bourbon-based...  

John Updike's OldFashioned

1932-2009

John Updike didn't fall into the same traps of overindulgence that plagued other writers of his era; he practiced moderation throughout his life and was rewarded by a long and successful publishing career.

However, the old fashioned features crucially in his 1960 novel Rabbit Run, proving Updike's familiarity with cocktails of the time.  

But while the cocktail played a key role in the novel's domestic tragedy, it would transcend these fraught associations - becoming part and parcel of the craft cocktail renaissance of the 21st century.

*  1 sugar cube

*  2 oz. bourbon

*  2 dashes angostura bitters

*  orange peel for garnishing

In a double rocks glass, muddle sugar cube with angostura bitters.  

Add bourbon and 1 large ice cube and stir with a barspoon to combine.  

Garnish with the organge peel. 

Source:  How To Drink Like A Writer

Writing by Margaret Kaplan

 

Schedule 2024

August

31                @Texas A&M               

September 

7                  Northern Illinois                                                       

14                @Purdue                                 

21                Miami (OH)                    Alumni Hall gang reunion               

28                Louisville

October  

                                                                                                     

12                Stanford                          The Brothers Corrigan game

19                @Georgia Tech                 

26                Navy

November 

 9                Florida State                               Night game - accepting couch viewing bookings

16               Virginia     

23               @Army  (Yankee Stadium)       McSorley's anyone?                        

30              @USC                                     

December

20             1st round playoff game at ND Stadium -- see you there.

Wager 2024

Gentlemen, start your engines...

There's lots of room for you on the bandwagon

The road may be rough, the weather may forget us... 

Predictions need to be in by kickoff Saturday night, 8/31. 

Wins	Director - ND Equivalence	Domer
12 Christopher Nolan	The Nick Saban of the film world - Nolan is Mr. Swing For The Fences Big Idea Guy, even if every effort isn't always a home run. But they are undeniably ... epic. Just like a 12-0 season.	Kevin C,  Lini Matt L., Brian M. Jay, John L. Ray
11 Martin McDonagh	Hello, he's Irish!   Solidly predictable for always being really, really good.  And as  his reputation has been burnished, the star talent in his cast has followed. Sound familiar?	Jerrence, Daryl Jim S, Tim C. Jerry C,  Mike C. Greg R., Bob S.
10 David Fincher	Pretty much a stud in both film and TV formats. Always interesting, albeit with palpably dark undertones... one is never sure how the story is going to end up.  Much like a 10 win season will feel like.	Pat B, Mike B. Bill, Jim B. Sloane, Alex Phillip, Randy Mike G.
9 Yorgos Lanthimos	Do I always understand what's going on his films?  Nope. But the ride is pretty enjoyable even when you don't know where you're going or even how you got there. Ultimately, you might end up appreciating it more than you thought at the time.	Alvin
8 Richard Linklater	Perhaps the product of recency bias - I quite liked 'Hit Man' - Linklater's films fall for this blogger  into the "nice-fun-I see an interesting insight" category.  They just don't feel especially memorable. Like we'd view an 8 win season.
7 Wes Anderson	When does quirky/idiosyncratic become tiresome? When you feel like you're watching - again - an inside joke that you're not included in. Anderson attracts an an all-star cast that no longer seems to add up to the sum of their parts. In a word, disappointing.
6 Lars Von Trier	Uncomfortable. Unpleasant.  Disturbing. Often off the rails, his films might be 'art' but it's tough to call it many people's definition of entertainment.

Schadenfreude of the Week.

Let's just say the schadenfreude vibes are starting off in a very, very promising fashion.

And with the early September schedule looking like it's got more than a few really good games -- a marked departure from typical years --  long may it last!

Consider this the 20204 season's amuse bouche.

Florida State.  First game of the year and... we're off to the races!  

If this were Vegas, they'd be advising the FSU program to step away from the tables, you're on a very cold streak and the house will not be extending you any more credit.

• December 2023
• QB gets hurt, get bypassed for the BCS playoffs despite being undefeated
• Georgia pastes FSU 66-3 in bowl game
• August 2024
• Upset by unranked Ga. Tech -- and traveling 4k to do so.

Terry's Tools.

Where did the time go?

Already late August, with Notre Dame football less than a week away.

And Tool Energy is starting to run on empty -- recognizing that we're not going to go full Defcon 1 and start siting political tools (this blog would end up being the length of a Russian novel). 

Luckily, we have a) the SEC  and b) narcissist coaches to bail us out.

It's not like the NCAA is going to come to the rescue...

1)  Deion Sanders.   Headline (and I'm paraphrasing here):  "Denver Post columnist says mean things about Coach Prime so Deion says I'm not gonna talk to you no more."  

Very mature, Deion.   

Well it's not like you did anything to deserve it.  Other than run off your entire team when you took the job, talk up your team (and your sons) as the greatest thing since sliced bread - then lose your last six games.  I can't imagine why that writer felt you'd be open for criticism.

2)  Georgia football driving.  Here's a fun fact:  football players at UGA have been involved in 24 driving-related violations (DUI, reckless driving, speeding, including a crash that killed a player and a recruiting staffer in January 2023.  

Not good.  But make no mistake, coach Smart is very -- no, extremely -- disappointed! 

What's that old chestnut, "Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me 24 times, I'm going to bring in a speaker!" 

You can't go on

Thinking nothing's wrong.

Who's going to drive you home... 

3)  Michigan / NCAA.  The NCAA hits Jim Harbaugh with a show cause -- ostensibly

suspending him from coaching in college for 4 years -- after he's left Michigan (and presumably never to return).

Way to be tough, NCAA.

That said, the hammer (velvet or something approximating a more substantial penalty) has yet to be dropped on his successor.  

Dare to dream. 

Name of the Month

Why let the humans have all the fun with creative names?

As perhaps our last homage to the 2024 Paris Olympics, let us call one of our favorite athletes, one of the UK's dressage entries, Becky Moody and her horse named:

Jagerbomb

For those curious, a Jägerbomb is a bomb mixed drink made by dropping a shot of Jägermeister into an energy drink, typically Red Bull.)  

Yikes.   I want to party with you, Becky. 

And your horse.

 

Final note:   Jagerbomb did not medal individually but did help Great Britain take bronze in the team competition.  Well done, faithful steed!

Final Thought

Mommy, what's wrong with Gaga?

Fact 1:  Denver is a GREAT town. 

Fact 2:  Much akin to Vizini’s admonition in The Princess Bride, never negotiate with a 3 yr old when ice cream is on the line.  

You WILL lose.  

Fact 3:  Jerrence’s final career path will not involve being an au pair.